1/12/10

She's hiding herself, she's beautiful, but she's hiding herself.
She's waiting for the worse possible moment
To show herself
And she yells at me. She tells me I'm fucking
Up. She stabs at my head with an ice pick.
That's if her voice isn't shrill enough.
She's a siren of noise, existing to give me
Headaches and make me scratch my hands up
Until they get raw and numb.
And the more I hate her, the more I love her.
She puts me to sleep, petting my head,
She's beautiful. She is me, in my head, but she
Exists. It's a ploy, tomorrow she'll tell me
Everyone is against me, read between the lines,
Hate yourself, failure. I trust her because
She forces me to. I need her, I lover her,
I want to die, she can kill me.
But she's hiding. She wants to scare me.
She's hiding. I hear her. She will find me.
She's fucking coming and I don't want her to
But she's coming and I'm going to scratch
My hands up again.